You have no idea how badly I need to 'Freak Out' right now. Yes, perhaps I have been playing The Sims 3 a little bit too much over the past few nights - from midnight to 5am, actually - but I'd say it's the most accurate feeling I've got at the moment.

It's because of job-searching. I'm not stressed over the actual search - in fact, I found one I'm interested in rather quickly, Google does wonders - but I'm stressed over getting the job. Contacting the job agency and telling them all about me and hoping they'll accept me, and if they do, I'll worry about how well I'd be at the job. It's a customer service job at the airport, until February or so, decent pay and most importantly! It has the option of a night shift from 11pm to 7am, which is practically perfect for a night owl like me. Dude, I sleep at 5am and I was always late for school in the mornings, there's no way you can get me to wake up for a morning job. Stay up all night? More likely.

Getting a temporary job after 'O's or 'A's is like a step into the next stage of life. Well, for me, I guess - other students would have already had temporary job experience after 'O's. Me? Went to Japan on holiday for two weeks, and then afterwards it was straight into JC life. I'm beginning to believe that so far, my entire life has been extremely sheltered from the outside world: primary school, GEP - parents today would consider that almost a guaranteed path into a good secondary school, IP through RGS into RJC...the only big stresser I ever had before 'A's was PSLE.

My two older sisters had polytechnic educations, they took up temp jobs during their school holidays passing out flyers and after their 'O's one worked at a Watsons' outlet in Raffles Place and the other worked in an F&B outlet at United Square. After graduating from poly they landed jobs relevant to their diplomas - my eldest sister who graduated with a diploma in biomedical sciences got a job as a lab tech, the other who graduated with a diploma in landscape architecture got a job as a...landscape architect. They have worked in the real world, they have skills extremely relevant to their line of work and their interests - I know my second sister loves her work - but what have I got to say for myself? Up until now, I still don't know what I'm good at. Not studies, that's for sure - and for that I fear not being able to advance to university - so at least I hope to be able to prove myself worthy in the working world.

Perhaps that's why I'm so scared and stressed. I fear that I won't be able to, and if I don't, there is nothing out there that I'm going to be good at. The world doesn't look kindly on no-gooders, everyone must have a worth to society, and if you can't find that what will you do? How can I be a burden on my parents? Surely, surely I must be good at something in this world! And I must find it!

The thing is, you won't know until you try. And I have to try. I absolutely must. There is no being afraid and scared of what may come if you haven't even tried. Just pick up the phone and call! It's the airport! It's a job where you can actually help the airport and the people who pass through it! And there's a night shift! If there's ever a temporary job that you'll love this is it.

After all, in a discussion with my mum once, I realised that the best time to experiment, to go around and find just what your true calling is, is now. When you're still young, when there is less or no expectation on you to find a reliable, well-paying job, now is the time to go around these temporary jobs, to see how they work, and to find out how comfortable you really are in them.

Good luck, Munirah! Have confidence, dear. Keep your spirits up, you'll eventually find out just where your path in life will take you. If it gets tough and it's choked up with all sorts of obstacles...GET A BLOODY PARANG AND WHACK YOUR WAY THROUGH IT. Or find a way around it, you know, same thing.